My sweet Courage Kairos.
Like your name, you were born out of the deepest longing of my heart and you came right on time.
Unexpected and in the middle of a snow storm, I labored almost 48 hours to get you here. You didn’t come like I had planned in my mind. I had prepared to celebrate you BIG as I tend to like to do. It’s the “extra” in me, always ready for a party, when most women want quiet and peace as they prep to bring life into the world, I wanted my very own, “Labor Party,” surrounded by my closest friends, complete with music and charcuterie, wine and contractions. And yet, like most things in life, my plan went quickly out the window when at 37 weeks, my body said “enough,” and I went into emergency induction.
Labor was hard and long and frustrating, but even through that process I was reminded of how I was built for it, how I was built for you. With every hour my strength was renewed as I reminded myself that I could do hard things. As Molly, Kate, Jenna and your dad cheered me every second of every minute toward getting to you.
Surrounded in love, you entered the world at 4:29a and when your dad announced you as our son, I was so happy you made your arrival safely, but when the doctors told him to “look again,” I burst into tears. My heart was overwhelmed by you, my precious baby girl. Everything about you has been a surprise and I couldn’t imagine that after some of the worst seasons of my life that you would come out of it. Every time I look at you, I am certain of my strength. I am constantly in awe of the way that God turns the things that were meant to harm us into something good and you have become a daily reminder of what it means to LIVE, fully and courageously. You remind me that second chances are real.
You’re six months now and it’s been a treat getting to know you. You are all the sweet things I asked God for this second time around and every day with you has been such a precious gift.
So here are a few things I’ve learned about you so far:
You are crazy about your mama. The way you look at me stops me in my tracks and puts the world into perspective. I have no problem putting everything behind you, which reminds me to also do the same for your big sister.
You learned how to a few Saturday evenings ago, your sister positioned you and after so many failed attempts before that, it just worked, but you much prefer to be held, carried or snuggled instead.
You are social in your own way. You love people, but you don’t smile on demand. It doesn’t seem to be your way, you make us all work for your smiles and your gleeful expression. You seem to always be taking in the things around you, gathering information and holding it close to you and just assessing what your next move is going to be. But, when we sing, “Bushel and a Peck” from Guys and Dolls, you instantly smile and start to bob your head and it's the CUTEST thing ever.
You will eat sweet potatoes and apples but you aren’t sure how you feel about bananas, but what you love most is eating our food and you are quick to grab our forks as quickly as possible to get a smooth taste.
Beyonce’s “Spirit” is your favorite song and you once watched the video 7x in a row without blinking. Okay, you blinked, but you didn’t turn your head away from the tv not even once.
You’re 100% in charge of our house. When you call EVERYONE comes running.
Our cousin in Haiti told me that when his son’s were born they celebrated every month with a cake. He said life at every landmark is worth celebrating. Well, tonight and always baby girl, we are eating the cake!
Happy 6 months Courage Kairos! Thank you for shifting my life in the best way.
With strength, courage and wisdom,